behind the glisten

of my brown eyes

there’s a mystery

that no one mortal can understand

you see

because I am

made up of something supernatural

how else am i still standing?

how else could not cry myself to sleep

every night?

how else could i still sing?

any mere mortal

would be committed by now

and not in a good way

my silence speaks louder

than any thousand word picture

or four page poem

it hold in what i regret

it keep hidden what most

will never figure out

it keeps me from making mistakes

its a gift

apart of the supernatural that makes me up

it keeps tamed the side

that could destroy a dynasty

the power of life and death

are predicated on the sound of my voice

so sometimes i chose not to speak

for fear of becoming a murderer

but sometimes i can’t help myself

i have to let the power be felt

its my saving grace

my gift and curse

BUT it can be your worst nightmare

so be careful….

I almost don’t want to write this down

Because deep down inside

I know you’re going to try

And find a way

To take my words and what I say

And try to make them your own

But I had a second thought

THAT would be impossible

There would be no way possible

That you could take what I’ve been through

What I go through

What I feel on a day to day

What I crave for

What I lust for

What I love

Who I love

Who I miss

The pain that courses through my body

Day in and day out

And even as this pen meet this paper…

Or even the song I sing

And turn it into your own

No matter how similar you think

We might be

My story, my words, my song, my pain,

My life is mine.

Whether or not I want to give parts away

First off

You’re nobody to be taking anything of mine

You wouldn’t want it if I was giving it away

And you probably wouldn’t even be able

To handle a piece of me

So you can try

I’ll laugh at your attempt

And I’m going to keep writing……

What I see

Is not what you see

You see a cnfident, Strong

Intelligent, immovable woman

I see someone

Who is broken and lonely

I see a heart that

Yerns to love and be loved

You see a smile

That could light up a room

You see legs that

Make strides long and Gracious

I see a person who is tired of walking.

You see a confidence

That is priceless

I see a mask put on

To hide the dried tear tracks

You see someone everyone gets along with

I HEAR what everyone says

When I walk away…….

You see all the good things I’ve done

I see and feel every time I’ve failed

You see eyes that are

Warm and inviting

But mine are calculating

Just how long it’s gonna take

For you to fuck me over……

Don’t take it person

It’s just the series

of Unfortunate Events

That have brought me to this place

of I Could Give A Fuck Less

About what you say

Because I know what you really mean…….